Friday, January 27, 2012

It's the little things...

Eight hours of sleep in 2 days.  Unwashed ponytail.  Dark circles under my eyes.  Tennis shoes and who knows what bodily fluids staining my scrubs.  That is what we like to call a hot mess.  So I swooned when the really sweet, mostly blind, half deaf old man yelled, "Hey!  You are pretty!"



Because here is thing.  Nothing is the same.  And by that I mean me.  The post baby body will never be like the pre.  Ever.  I knew it was coming the second I saw the pink plus sign.  Fine, it comes with the territory.  And yeah yeah yeah the kid is worth every stretch mark.  So thank you to the cute demented sweetheart.  It really is the little things.


Bamboozled...

I have been bamboozled.  That's right.  Bamboozled by a 6 month old.  Nugget used to be the best sleeper.  At 5 weeks old she was sleeping 12 hours per night.  I felt energized.  Other new moms envied me.  I thought "wow, this parent thing is a breeze!"  Then it happened.  She suddenly felt the need to check in with her parents during the wee hours of the morning.  "Hey Mom, I just wanted to say hi and maybe take a few swigs of milk!"  So I get up.  At least once.  Sometimes twice.



At the ripe old age of twelve weeks the smiling round ball of goodness learned to manipulate her mother while her father snored in bed.  I thought she was hungry.  I mean, this girl can eat.  She weighs almost 20 pounds at 6 months old.  She is literally sucking the life out of me.  But you experienced moms have told me and I completely believe you, she is not hungry.  I get it.  I need to let her cry it out.  I just can't find it in my heart to let the Nuggs exercise her lungs while I lie in bed hoping she doesn't hate me.

Now I don't feel energized.  Now I feel exhausted and crazy.  I swear I will never catch up on my sleep.  Ever.  I will always live off of coffee and crawl out of bed with my eyes half glued shut.  She is cute, but not that cute.  Someone tell me what to do.  How to do it.  And someone explain to my child that she will not starve and if she can find it in her heart not to think I am the worst mother ever that would also bring me a little comfort.  Until then, keep up the 2 a.m. feedings because I find the chubby, warm, sleepy, bald manipulator to be just about perfect.


Friday, January 20, 2012

Stranded and Eating


I have eaten almost an entire box of Annie's cheese bunny crackers and half a bag of chocolate chips.  Yep, the blizzard of 2012 has me confined to my house.  Confined to Washington really.  My flight to Denver was cancelled this morning.  Consequently I have probably gained 5 pounds.  Maybe I should get out and shovel the driveway.  It is more likely I will eat the rest of the salt and vinegar chips that are merely taking up space in my cupboard.